Many investors get into crypto expecting outsized results. With outsized results comes two tyrants that will wreck you, if you let them. This is a guest article written by Wolf Pup #0, read on to learn more.
I’ve been fortunate to speak on many stages and have conversations with people around the world about web 3 and what has become obvious is that there are a ton of brilliant minds working on the technology and very few working on the humans using the technology. New technology brings new opportunity, new opportunity brings friction to friends, family and people close to us.
For blockchain to be successful, both need to be addressed. If everyone blows up their personal life to jump on something new, that new thing has done more harm than good. That said, here is an old article, rewritten for The Guardian Academy.
Over the past few years I have been compiling a “toolbox” of success. For Nicsmas (now free on the success finder) I taught my personal toolbox for closing the gap between where you’re at now and where you want to be. What many Nicsmas members are experiencing is that, even though they are finally focused on how to close the gap, their friends, family, partners and peers are providing friction. This is typical human behavior. Let’s talk about tools to deal.
New Tool #1: Identify the Two Tyrants of Leadership:
“A Champion is someone that has honored their gifts and fulfilled their potential.”
Dr. Jeff Spencer
I was walking my wolf pups, Jasper and Tundra, yesterday thinking about something my mentors said on Friday. Jasper and Tundra are brothers; litter-mates. That has always surprised people because they look so different, and because they have very different personalities. Jasper is far more black wolf than dog and Tundra is far more gray wolf than black wolf.
Wolf Pup #0 – Tundra
Wolf Pup #2742 Jasper
One is more curious than the other, and one has far more energy than the other.
But when we go on our walks, I realized that even though Jasper HAS to be slightly in front of Tundra he will constantly look back and slow down if Tundra slows down, and Tundra will speed up if Jasper gets too far ahead.
They are never more than a foot apart from each other.
So, I was thinking about this idea that was broken down on Friday, and I gently pulled Tundra to the left a little bit to create distance between him and Jasper, who, without prompting, also drifted to the left to keep the same distance between them.
And then I gently pulled Jasper to the right and Tundra drifted with him, again, to maintain the distance.
Humans aren’t so different, especially when we are in the presence of the people we have known the longest. Get with a group of close friends and try it:
Raise your voice and notice how everyone else’s voice rises. Lower it and everyone else will lower theirs. Walk a little faster and everyone else will pick up their pace, slow it down and they will slow down to match your speed.
Humans who feel like they are part of a particular “pack” will do everything they can to prevent other “pack” members from creating distance from them.
This is good for the members of the pack who are coming from a place of scarcity because it’s a survival instinct. It’s not so good for the people who want to fulfill their potential because, as they grow, they will create distance between their “pack” and themselves – especially when the rest of the pack cannot keep up.
Back to Friday’s Summit. The question came up,
“Why don’t people fulfill their potential?”
Randy Massengale, in his infinite wisdom, said: “The Two Tyrants of Leadership”:
Scrutiny and Expectation
First, the individuals with all the potential in the world who never realize it, can’t get away from the eyeballs on them. They don’t know how to release themselves from the scrutiny and haven’t developed the skill to disconnect and recharge.
Everything they do is under the microscope by spectators (more on this in a bit).
Second, the expectations become overwhelming. People expect them to win, entire countries may count on them to bring home a gold medal, thousands of employees could be counting on them to cover their paychecks.
But the biggest risk, in my opinion, comes not from the scrutiny and expectations of the rest of the world, but from those of your own “pack.”
Your best friends, partners and even family will criticize you for going to bed early instead of staying up with them like you used to, or for working late into the weekends instead of watching movies with them like you used to (scrutiny).
Because they can sense that you are creating distance.
And then they will expect you to share the rewards of that early morning or late night work with them (expectation).
Because they can sense that you are creating distance.
…and since they are not willing to do what you are doing, they will find a million ways to try and govern your progress [minimize the distance] – often without realizing they are doing it.
And if we are not keenly aware of it, we can end up in a brutal spiral.
The scrutiny is mentally exhausting → we have to work twice as hard to get our work done.
The expectations lead to us sharing our rewards → we end up working twice as hard for a fraction of the reward.
On the other side of it, your “pack” is being rewarded for refusing to do the work. They complain, cause friction, and then reap the benefit of your hard work. It becomes a pretty gnarly spiral that will burn out any ambitious person who can’t recognize it and break the cycle.
So, how does one break the cycle?
Two cycle-breaking tricks to keep in the back pocket at all times:
- Want to jump in?
- The Tank or the Trunk
First, Randy says that the key is to give people who are making problems an assignment. If they complain about your early Friday night bedtime, invite them to help you out with something at 5AM on Saturday. If they complain about you being at the office all weekend, invite them to come with you and jump into the work so you get it done faster.
When you get resistance for working hard or being disciplined, just ask them, “Wanna jump in?” If they say yes, great. If they say no, great. Either way, they’ve forfeited their excuse to be a pain.
Second, when you run into friction, you can either put it in the trunk or the tank. My notes from Randy’s explanation:
“Everybody has something they have to overcome:
What extraordinary people understand is that your issues either go in your trunk and you carry them away and they weigh you down or it goes into your tank and you use it as fuel.
The most extraordinary people have gone through some amazing catastrophe and they put in their tank as fuel to do the next thing.
They stop and put it in their trunk and then look back and let it weigh them down. People always remind me of things that I didn’t do right – they may use it without a doubt, but I can use it with confidence.
You fail → goes into trunk → carry it around → because you’re carrying around your failure
The ones that succeed turn scrutiny and failure into fuel.
I’ve met Nelson Mandela a few times and he was in law school getting A’s even when he was in prison on trial for treason.”
It’s not the “world” that is going to prevent you from stepping into your greatness. It’s your pack… if you let them.
We must learn to stay balanced, know ourselves, have difficult conversations and, to do anything extraordinary, be comfortable with the distance that will be created.
You know, become a Gray Wolf. (Which is what the Guardian Academy is all about).
Check it out here: https://guardianacademy.io/
(Just start with all the free stuff)
Hope this is helpful,
Onward.
Follow Wolf Pup#0: https://twitter.com/PeterNicson
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